Saturday, 5 December 2020

Satu Jawaban

Derik suara jangkrik saling menyahut memecah kesunyian malam. Rasanya semakin menegaskan bahwa malam sudah semakin larut. Aroma tanah selepas hujan menyeruak ke seluruh penjuru. Segar, pekat namun tak berlebihan, itu jelas hanya Sang Pencipta yang mampu meramunya.

Kupandangi beberapa bintang yang nampak berkedip. Indah, seakan saling membisikkan salam malam dan rasa terimakasih untuk hari ini. 

Semakin dingin,

Kurapatkan kembali sweater rajut yang sedari tadi kupakai. Masih begitu dingin, dan membuat ku tersadar, sudah menua rupanya raga ini. 

"Buk..?? kok belum sare, to??" 

"Iya, sebentar lagi, masih belum bisa merem tadi."

"Ya sudah nanti kalau sudah terasa ngantuk masuk ya, Buk... Anin masuk kamar dulu, ya, besok Anin masuk pagi." Ujar anak gadisku yang genap berumur 25 tahun esok lusa

"Iya, nduk... Emmm, Nduk???"

"Ya??? kenapa, Buk?"

"Hemm, Mbak Jelita ndak pernah nelpon kamu, Nduk?"

"Emmm, sudah lama nggak telepon kayaknya, Buk, mungkin Mbak Jelita sama Mas Bagas sibuk, Buk."

"Iya mungkin ya, yawis cepet tidur sana biar besok ndak terlambat bangun." 

....

Masih enggan untuk beranjak dari kursi kayu yang sedikit terdengar reyot bila aku bergerak sedikit saja, kupandangi sekali lagi langit malam ini.

"Kemana mereka, ya? sudah hampir sebulan sejak kepulangan mereka, kok belum ngabari aku juga." Gumamku lirih pada diri ini sendiri

Aku merindukan Aruna. Bocah lima tahun, cucuku satu-satu nya, paling tidak hingga saat ini, dari anak pertama ku, Bagas. Terbayang celotehan lucunya yang kerap kali membuatku terkekek-kekek. Hemmm, seandainya aku bisa memeluk nya setiap hari tanpa terhalang jarak yang ratusan kilometer ini, betapa bahagianya hari-hariku. 

"Aruna kangen Mbah Putri nya ini ndak, ya?"

"Bagas sama Jelita kangen aku ndak, ya?"

"Bagaimana kabar mereka, ya?"

"Apa aku besok telepon mereka, ya?"

"Apa Bagas lupa sama aku, Ibuknya ya?"

"Apa Jelita lupa sama aku, ibu mertua nya?"

"Apa Jelita sebenarnya ndak suka sama aku, ya?'

Banyak sekali pertanyaan dalam hati ini. Rasa ingin menghubungi mereka tiap waktu namun selalu kutepis pun semata mata karena aku tidak ingin mereka terlalu terganggu dengan kehadiranku. Aku hanya tidak ingin menjadi profil Ibu yang terlalu ikut campur dengan kehidupan rumah tangga anak-anakku pun pada anakku perempuan kelak ketika dia menikah.

Tapi mengapa aku belum juga bisa mengerti isi hati menantuku, Jelita yang sudah hampir 7 tahun ini ku kenal. Dia anak yang baik, aku beruntung bisa menitipkan anak laki-laki ku satu-satunya pada perempuan mumpuni sepertinya yang rela untuk berkorban melepaskan mimpi-mimpinya demi mengurus keluarga.  

Namun terkadang ada sepercik tanya di hati ini, apakah aku sudah menjadi mertua yang baik untuknya, apakah dia merasa nyaman menjadi menantuku? 

Entahlah, pertanyaan yang masih belum juga bisa terjawab. 

Malam sudah semakin sangat dingin.

Kuputuskan untuk beranjak dari bangku kayu ini. Langkah kaki dialasi sandal teplek ini terasa sedikit basah dengan menyeruaknya kubangan bekas air hujan seharian tadi. 

"Semoga mereka sehat selalu..."

Doaku, dari seorang Ibu...

Thursday, 3 December 2020

Satu Pertanyaan

Matahari masih enggan menampakkan diri seharian ini. Rintik hujan masih anteng menemani detik demi detik. Sudah pukul tujuh malam rupanya.

"Mas Bagas kemana ya kok belum sampai rumah juga" bisikku hampir tak terdengar pada diriku sendiri.

Sembari berjalan ke dapur ku tengok kamar Aruna. Bocah 5 tahun itu sudah terlelap dalam mimpi dan buaian suara nyanyian hujan rupanya. kubenarkan letak selimut nya yang sudah berlarian ke segala arah.

Ahhh, aku hampir lupa untuk segera memanaskan sup rawon buat makan malam Mas Bagas nanti. Tanpa kusadari aku sudah melamun hingga kuah rawon hampir membludak tumpah karena mendidih.

"Tinnnn Tinnnn..."

Suara klakson motor Mas Bagas.

"Assalamualaikum" Terdengar pintu rumah terbuka.

"Waalaikum salam, Mas, sudah pulang? kehujanan kah, Mas?"

"Iya, turun dari kereta masih hujan tadi, Dek."

"Ya sudah buruan mandi sana nanti masuk angin lho." 

Ku siapkan makan malam untuk Mas Bagas sembari menunggunya selesai mandi. Hampir lupa, aku pun belum makan malam rupanya. Kusiapkan piring untukku juga.

"Aruna sudah tidur?"

"Sudah, Mas, habis makan terus tidur dia."

Dan kami pun tenggelam dalam makan malam kami.

Hingga,

"Mas, aku pengen ngomong sesuatu..."

"Ada apa, sih, kok serius begitu..."

"Emmmm, Mas, kok Ibuk ndak pernah nanyain kabar kita ya...?"

"Maksudnya?'

"Sudah hampir sebulan semenjak kepulangan kita ke kampung, tapi ibuk ndak pernah telepon aku"

"Hemmm, lha kamu kok ya ora telepon duluan?"

"Minggu lalu aku nyoba telepon Ibuk, tapi ndak diangkat, Mas, ya mungkin Ibuk lagi sibuk, Ibuk blas ndak telepon kamu juga, Mas?"

"Lha yang biasanya telepon kan kamu to , Dek."

"Apa Ibuk ndak kangen Aruna ya, Mas?"

"Hemmm... Ya mungkin Ibuk lupa mau telepon Aruna." Jawab Mas Bagas sambil meneguk gelas minumnya.

....

"Ya mosok lupa punya cucu" Batinku dalam hati sambil membersihkan meja bekas makan malam kami.

Kumatikan semua lampu dapur, hanya lampu duduk di meja pojok yang kutinggalkan menyala.

Sekali lagi ku cek kamar Aruna, pelan-pelan kututup pintunya.

Mas Bagas sudah tertidur.

Aku pun bergegas membersihkan muka dengan harapan agar cepat bisa tidur juga, sudah sepat sekali rasanya mata ini.

"Jelitaaa, Jelitaaa, bagaimana sih biar kamu bisa mengerti isi hati Ibu mertua mu?" Tanyaku pada diriku sendiri, berbisik tentunya.

"Apa Ibuk ndak pengen tahu keadaan cucunya?"

"Apa Ibuk ndak pengen dengar suara cucunya?"

"Apa Ibuk ndak pengen liat kabar kita?"

"Apa Ibuk ndak kangen kita?"

"Apa Ibuk ndak suka sama aku, mantu nya?"

Dan berakhir lah semua pertanyaan itu di satu pertanyaan sama yang selalu kupertanyakan tujuh tahun ini.

Entahlah..

Tak ada yang bisa memberikan jawaban yang pasti.

Suara rintik hujan masih menemaniku malam ini, hingga aku terlelap dan melupakan lagi semua pertanyaanku tadi.


Sunday, 27 September 2020

Your Judging vs Allah's Judging

Hayyyy...
Love to be back at this page...
Anyone miss my trashy stories???
Hahahaha, why am I so confident...

So confused where I should begin the story today.
We will have a glance discussion about the value of life this time.

Please to not be mistaken, I am not a life motivator as Mario Teguh or Merry Riana btw wkwkwkwkwkw. I will just want to.share my uneg uneg.

Sometimes, when I listen to my friend's stories, my relatives' stories, I often get some identical main problem. We, as human, have a very big problem with other's judgement.

How do you get your self-value??
How do you judge your own self whether You are including a good person or a bad person???
How do you see your self through your life???

Okay, we may have mirror, but reflecting our own self and deciding whether we are good or bad are difficult things to do.

For you who have a very high confidence, you will exactly say that you are a good person no matter what. but, for me, that's not just a simple case.

Then, where will we go to decide it??
We may see our reflection through others' opinion.
When a person doesn't like you as a whole packet, it means you are not a good person for him/her.

People easily judge our own self just by looking at our surface from our social media, or by a short glancing. Then they will judge us "uhhh she is a bad person" "uuhhhh she is not religious enough" "uhhh she is a bad mom" "dont make friend with someone like an evil I mean like her". and all the judgement comes frommmmmm a short screening through social media and even you all meet rarely πŸ˜‘. That's freakingly confusing, sooo confusing...

How comeeee heyyyy Bambang.
Even your mother who give you birth and take care of you along her life sometimes still cannot refer your characteristic πŸ˜‘...
And then there are some people who judge you easily just by looking you at a glance,
Heyyyyy, you dont see her/him in 24 hours 7 days and every minute of his/her life.
And you call someone bad or good, it's like you who has problem on attitude and manner.
I think its only Your God who knows you well.
I am a moeslem.
Just me and my Allah who know me very well. My hubby, my mom, my sisters and even my daughter my own family who stay with me everyday may still don't know me (njobo njero).
Allah is Veryyyyy Kind,
It's only Allah who can judge human's sin and human's fine reward by doing good deeds or bad deeds. and I think all religion teach that kind of lesson.

Who are you taking the judgement easily???
You even dont create him/her.

I remember an old proverb says "people see what they want to see"
very subjectional, and not so fair because of many factors.

Okay, its your choice to choose who will be your inner circle. but it's so unair to judge others good or bad and being done with them like a sh*t 😳.

She may not put in a well properly halal wear, but you dpnt see her when she love to share with others and she doesnt like to show it off.
She may talk carelessly and loud and orough, but you dont see her when she try to be sincere to everybody she meets.
You just dont know,
and you still easily judge others,
so unfair,

It never goes wrong to be kind to all people you meet,
Keep your private opinion for your own,
When you think you can not get along with someone, keep it, dont put your judgement directly and being like you are the most right person in the world, like Javanese says "kemersik".

I take it as my self-note also. I will also try to be kind and good to everyone I meet and I know, talking without underestimating others, low profile and not being such a "mrs. know all the things" person.

A mom who give micin to her child doesnt mean she doesnt love her child. We just dont know how she struggle to get her child eating up thr food. we just dont know how she had struggled to cook many kind of food to make her child open up her mouth. we just dont know.

Stop judging just by looking at a glance.
Try to respect others.
Life will be sweeter if we respect each other.

Hahahaha, I write too much I guess,
It's been late,
I will stop it here,
Let's continue next days, Pretty Mommies...
Stay safeee...

Tuesday, 8 September 2020

Today's stories...

Today,
did me a favor,
got me emotional,
put me in worried,
caught me falling,
stole the vibe,
shared various stories.
sent me some news,
took me think a million step forward,

That, none of them can't be elucidated clearly,
Why?
I'm feeling so terribly trembling,
Today,
It did, too much stories came,
And,
I couldn't hand it more,
It's too much,
Ahhh,
Today's dusk was not as pretty as it used to be,
I was like walking in the silent path,
sad, lonely, empty,
Again,
too much stories came, Today...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ahhhh, I can't describe what's going on in my head right now,
just feeling too much that I can cry a river,
I'm sad,
I'm confused,
I regret something,
I'm feeling guilty,
I'm tired,
I'm ahhhh sudahlah...
Senja hari ini terasa berbeda,
Banyak penyesalan,
Kegundahan,
Tanya,
dan Doa...
Semoga semua baik-baik saja,
Wish everything going to be okay,
I wish...

Wednesday, 15 July 2020

Being a breadwinner or My parent set me free??

Haiiii, Mommies...
Back again at my blog...
I got a fever, and feeling a little bit unwell for sure..

Okay,
This time, I wanna share a tiny discussion about life negotiation and dealing with parent. I read an article and it seems that this discussion become trending recently.

A woman said in her twit, that children is not a money mechine to dig in. She said it's too tired to bring all burden and cover all the need of her parent after she got a job. Means she's working for her parent and her family though she doesn't want it. She claimed that children is not an investation.

In the other hand,
Some other people gave their objection. A man twitted that giving money to our parent eon't make you become poor. It will pay back twice and more and moreeee (lhoh lhohhh nape jadi lirik lagu nya TWICE, *I am not a ONCE fyi 🀣🀣🀣).

When I read this discussion posted on IG,
Hemmmm...
I am like...
I am in the middle...
No, not neutral I mean,
I am just like, okayyyy, the two opinions above are just right.
We have our own case,
And we can not refer which case is better.
because yahhhh, Each family has their own stories..

I will give you a lil bit story (from my family point of view),
My mom (my Dad had passed away 😁), she is typically a "not-asking-too much" parent. When I worked long time ago, she doesn't ask anything. When I am merried, also, she doesn't ask anything.
I've given her some penny, She didn't accept it.
And I asked her why? She just answered that she didn't want to take it because it's from my husband, literally I am not working right now, and she said that she had enough from her own bill (she's a nurse).
And the most surprising thing, she said that,
"if you want to pay back at me, just give it to ur childeren, treat them like I treat you, grow them as I grew you, give them life better than I gave you life back then, that's the way how you can pay me back"
And can't hold my tear,
I am feeling so useless as a children,
Honestly, my hubby and I, we are still struggling to reach our dream, and maybe we still can't help our parents much,
Andddd..
My mother's statement above makes me less worried.
I am soooo teary hearing this, yet feeling calm,
My mother of course still have some need to cover up, buy she doesn't force me to help her, she said that growing ur children, send them to a good school is just an ordinary thing as if you are eating three times a day, as if you take a bath twice a day, so if you have to struggle for your children, it's so ordinary thing, and never thinking that my children have to pay me back.
However, I am as her child of course always want to help. But then, this also effects my mind set also toward my children later.
I will be very happpyyyyy if I can make her success, and when she can make a living better than us, I will just ummmm okay, there is no need to pay us back as her parent.
It is more thsn enough for me,
She can be independent and live a happy life with her family later 😘...

That a little bit of my opinion,
No offense for.other opinion,
If you feel that helping ur parent is a must and have to, it's also an awesome thing to do.
In my conclusion,
"A good parent is a parent who never asking you too much, and a good children will try to give their parent as much as they can"

Okay,
It's enough I think for today's discussion, Mommiesss...
If you want to share your stories or opinion, just share it in comment section,
Thank's for listening my uneg uneg 🀣🀣...

See ya in the next post...

Thursday, 11 June 2020

Wanna have One? Two? Three? or A Hundred Kids?

Hayyyy, Mommies...
Nicee to see you,

Yes, it does. I go to this blog whenever I am feeling upset, buahahaha... frequently, sorry...
And I think this is one reason why I write blog 🀣.

First of all, I wanna ask you a question. How many kids that you have?
One?
Two?
Three?
Ten?
I am just asking you how many?
I dont ask you "why you just have one?"
"why you just have two?"
"why you don't make a football team for pleasureee?"
Thanks A LOT...
We often conduct those kind of question just for trying to be chill out...
Oh please, would you like to pleaseee asking other questions?
We have soooo manyyy other questions to chill one another.
For me,
I am not comfortable when some people ask (literally asking but a lil bit pushing πŸ˜₯) me to have more children.
I am a mom with a four years old daughter.
I am happy,
I love my life now,
I enjoy it,
That's it.
and When you all see I haven't had another baby yet, of course I must have the reason why.
Even when I don't have any reason and trying to have another baby, it's not right to ask "why you dont try to have another one?" question.
Come on guys
Having kids is one of someone's private area.
It's no joke to have this question or even push othets to have more children.
It goes same when we ask a single person "when will you marry, darling?" in the fact that she/he is struggling to find their soulmate to marry,
or asking a couple "When will you have babies, dear?" in time that they are struggling to have a baby.
Got it?
That's a lil bit unpolite to ask those kind of questions.
Honestly,
I am so done and tired everyyyy time people around me asking ang persuing me to have another baby.
Thankyou,
I am enjoying my life now,
My daughter grows well, I start to enjoy a fun time, a little bit relaxed, with less cry and I begin to enjoy my mommy-time.
I am not saying that I reject Allah's Rizqi,
But I am not sure enough to get pregnant again.
I dont want to have too much responsibility.
I want to be focus on my only daughter and get the best path for her life.
and Labor got me so traumathic😭.
Please, if you say that's okay bla bla bla,
heyyyy you, we are absolutely different person.
Delicious for you but maybe not delicious for me.
That's not that good, guys to push around others even it's just for mambo jambo.
You have two kids? that's your right
You have three or five children? that's also your right, Darling and I don't even care your desicion why you have ten children. That's your life, you're happy with that, or you're unhappy, it's your life.
There is no rules to have more than one child, sm I right?
Then why it looks so nasty to just have a child in your life?
Comeee on 😝...
Ahhh, enough...
I am sharing this story to discuss with you guys,
Let's take a moment and think deeply,
It's also self reminder for me,
You wanna have mambo jambo, think twice what you say to others.
Don't go too far in their private life.
Remember, every person must have a reason when they decide to do something.
Have a good sleep, everyone.
See ya in the next post 😊...

Semangkuk Mie dan Kisahku Hari Ini

Malam sudah semakin larut,
Semua telah rapi tertata kembali,
dan siap untuk 'bertempur' lagi esok hari,
Ku pastikan tak ada yang tertinggal,
Tak lupa ku cek isi termos untuk bekal susu semalaman,
Ahhh... lelahnya hari ini, esok, dan esoknya lagi,
Aku tersenyum,
Betapa mulia Kau siapkan semua tugas ini bagi kami untuk mendapatkan Ridhomu Ya Allah,
Badan terasa pegal,
Ku pastikan semua pintu sudah terkunci,
Ahhhh...  masih terlalu 'sore' untuk memejamkan mata,
Jam masih menunjukkan pukul sepuluh,
Suasana telah lengang,
Suami dan anak pun sudah terlelap nyenyak sekali,
Kembali ke dapur,
Mari kita 'berpesta' sedikit, kataku pada diriku sendiri,
Tak lama pun terhidang panci berkebul kuah panas,
Semangkuk mie dengan potongan sayur dan cabe rawit siap untuk menghiburku,
Ku putar video drama favoritku yang entah sudah berapa hari terputus-putus hanya untuk menyelesaikan satu episode saja,
Terlalu nikmat,
Suatu kebahagiaan kecil dan 'reward' buat ku untuk menutup lelah hari ini dengan 'ritual' kecil seperti ini,
Pun telah cukup untuk mengisi pundi-pundi semangat untuk menjalani hari esok,
Yang mungkin akan berjalan sama seperti kemarin, lusa, dan hari-hari sebelumnya,

Aku, semangkuk mie dan sepotong kisahku sebagai Ibu Rumah Tangga yang terdengar biasa, sangat biasa 😊
Namun Aku bahagia,



Juni, 2020

Tuesday, 19 May 2020

Dealing With Fam-nemies..

Haiii...
How's life?
Still, not so well outside...

I won't discuss about virus or whatever related to the world today,
I am just... Dissapointed.

We all have family who love us unconditionally.
However, what about having Fam-nemies in our life?

I am just creating this phrase, "Fam-nemies". I didn't know whether this phrase has been exist before or not. anyone? have you ever heard this phrase somewhere maybe? 

I think that is so suitable for people who are literally having family relationship with us but make bad of our days. You have relation with them, but they are so annoying.

In order to keep the family relationship, you still have to keep being nice eventhough you want to throw up because of their act. And the most cringy thing isssss you can not move away from this condition. We have to grab up the reality and smile just like "everything is okay, Darlinggg dadar gulinggg...

I am so tired πŸ˜₯..
Very exhausted...
To "follow" their rules..
okay, this is my blog, and of course All the things here are based on my personal opinion and so subjective. 

My husband and I always try our best to keep the relationship with them. But, they always go further with their act. I wonder why there are such people having bad tempered and so annoying. 

Actually, I do hate a "two-faced" person. They love to "lick" others. They will be super nice to us when we have done something that giving benefit to them. And becaming so annoying when we are no longer profitable for them. Naissss... or Najisss... Iuhhhh....

Naudzubillahiminzalik for becoming such person...
Munnafiq is one of the most hated character by Allah SWT. Hope that we all grow in good path and able to avoid all the stupidity above. 

In decision, maybe I am doing wrong if I call them fam-nemies but that is the truth. I have to deal it along my lifetime, damn... 

My mother had told me how to deal with such person. First, if you think you are brave enough to beat them, do it! You have rights to stand up youself upon them. Yet, you think that you aren't brave enough to defend you self, just pull off yourself and take down all your action. It's better for your mental health. Just put off all the things about them for example, dont save their phone number, dont be curious about their status, dont try to search everything related them. Then, your life will be more peaceful I guess...

I've tried it so many times, it's hard exactly to deal with Fam-nemies. In addition, when you are not mature enough to face the situation. You have to choose the right action. and then feeling tired.

Honestly I am kinda giving up my self but my husband always support me and giving some advice although it still doesn't work. 

The fact that you can not avoid this messy, you have to put them in the back-EST priority in your life. Come onnnnn, just make them as an useless shadow. Your life is more precious. Your family that love you unconditionally are more important to think. 

It's exactly not easy, but just give a trust that Allah always listen to Us, to our prayer and believe that Allah will help us. Everything here is written. Wish that they (your fam-nemies) can go better.

Hemmmm....
Cheer up...
Be happy...
Your life, your rights, your decision to be happy or unpeaceful all the time...
See ya in the next post...

Wednesday, 29 April 2020

Ramadhan in The Middle of Pandemic Condition

An Extraordinary Ramadhan (2020)


Haiiii, Moms...
Can you believe it?
We've been in the seventh day of Ramadhan...
Alhamdulilah...

But,
This Ramadhan is a little bit, no, it's much different from the other Ramadhan we have before.
This time, Ramadhan seems to be quiet.

A quiet Ramadhan...

There is no Tarawih in Jamaah, no Tadarus in group, no children's laughter and noise in Mosque whom we usually hear in Iftar and Sahoor time.
So sad...

I miss the moment we can go out searching for some Takjil snack and cycling around with my daughter and hubby for Ngabuburit...

This Ramadhan is much different.

We are all still struggling to survive from virus outbreak. In addition, we are not allowed to have some Mudik in Ied day. Ahahaha... that's smart solution to stop the virus spreading. But, for me, it's quite hard. I usually go to Madiun once in three or four months, and this time, I can not have a break to Madiun in long period.

We are missing each other (my families and us here). Feeling hit the bottom? Of course, almost everyday. My stress level is beyond awesome πŸ˜…. I am not lying by the way. Lucky me, my hubby' still has some WFH until the untold time. So tentative πŸ˜…. 

Yas, It makes us having more quality some these days. Some people say there is always a good thing in the worst day. Maybe yes, Allah gives us time to cuddle more. 

Have you heard that pollution's ranks point decrease recently? Even Jakarta looks better now. Is it good? Maybe yas, but I think it doesn't mean that we need virus outbreak to heal Earth's condition πŸ˜…. We can LEARN that we, human, actually can change our earth condition if we struggle seriously. And it's proved now.  Let's continue to maintain thia circumstances though the virus has gone later on. 

And,
Still, there is time when I am feeling super frustrated and wanna cry much. Korean drama can not heal anymore (beside having some ibadah). Then, exercising while listening some music sometimes helps me a lot to make up my mood. Baking? not for these days. I am less excited for baking ☹️ recently. 

Having some learning activities with my daughter is another helpful way to get rid our boring time. Poor her, she can not go out and play with her friends whenever she wants. Ya, we stay at home in whole time πŸ˜„. The school has some break also. 

Ahhh... 
No time for complaining much,
Useless,
Allah must have some reasons giving this situation to us.
All we can do is just praying, praying, and praying.

Ahhhh...
It's so up and down, and honestly I don't like it 😭.
So grateful we still can eat properly. Meanwhile, there are so much unlucky people who lose theor job related this issue.

Moms, 
Let's be cheerful for our family...
Let's be more optimist and put in moreeee trust to Allah that Allah will help us to overcome this problem. Aamiin...


  • April, 30th...






Wednesday, 22 April 2020

A poem tonight


 A PERFECTION

Those beautiful sky at dust
Golden in the edge
Growing dark as what it seems
But it returns deep blue across the side

When you feel stucked
Nobody knows GOD has prepared a bridge
A bridge to come over
Into the other part of your life

ALLAH S.W.T gives a compass
For us not being lost
In this Donya
That full of camouflage

It's us,
Who decide to use that compass
or let it be meaningless

We live in a scary world
Within a glance,
You can't define
What is right
What is wrong
Who's right
Who's UNDENIABLE

Some of them are having disguise
Some of them are honest but can't control their honesty
We may be unable to differenciate
And as the time has gone by...
Our maturity will teach us...
Teach how to potray A PERFECTION...


Sunday, 15 March 2020

Panic at the Disco ( a mom's story related to the virus outbreak)

Hay everyone...
It's not so good by the way...
surely it does...

We have a bad news, related to the virus outbreak recently...

who's telling that I am not panic?
Of course, I am telling you, I am panic...
I can't lie anymore, once more I am telling you that I am panic...

I sometimes at the stage of "giving up" as I don't know about the future...
I live nearly Jakarta...
and the cases mostly infect in Jakarta and the nearly regions...

I wanna crying everytime I watch some news in TV or in IG.
Today, the lockdown starts,
My husband is having some break from the office...
We used to be happy,
But it's not now...
It's an awful thing right now...
hiks...
No, we are not doing okay as we don't trust Allah's help to solve all this problem,
but do you realize that this is one kind of His bless to examine His people...
I am so sure Allah has a best plan to us...
and still...
I can't lie, I am panic...
We have tried our best to prevent from getting infected, in addition (Note with underline) I have a baby 😭😭😭😭...
How can I be so calm?! 😭😭😭
I am trying to make everyone is doing fine like eating generously and on time, consuming some vitamins, etc.
what about when we need to go out from home?
We exactly still need to have a lil time going out to buy some nececeries.
and I am so busy think what we might see and touch when we go to indomaret for example.
Okay, I am so terrible right now 😭😭😭😭...
From the news I've heard, the infections has spreaded locally.
We don't know whom we see out there.
Okay, please be calm Sekar...
So many selegrams I follow love to share informatiom related to this issue. Okay, Thanks veryyy veryyyy much, it does help me, surely help that I am able to think what I am supposed to do.
But please lahhhh, please, don't make everything getting in rush and even we are more pathetic histerical and think what we actually don't need to think now. Please, I am mentally hurt, let's remind each other in positive ways...
Let's just not make a "burned-beautifully caption" and make us even more panic 😭😭😭...
Just please...
We all know this is a serious matter.
Emmmm maybe it's just me who's too sensitive...
I just don't know why, but I think my neighbours are not as worried me...
They are still acting normal in their daily life...
Is it just me that "super- lebay"? 😭😭😭
Yes, I am a "parnoan" person from the first...
We have used mask and washed our hands as often as we can...
but still I am panic...
I am so stressful...
I hope this is just a dream and we woke up and everything is fine, normal as used to be...
😭😭😭😭
I am writing this headline just to share my feeling 😭😭😭
A mother of a 4YO baby...
Even I loose my appetite and loose my mood every single hour right now...
I am so frightened...
Let's all pray, wish and hope that everything can be soon fine and back to the normal...
😭😭😭
I was worried so much when the flood happened last time, then now I learn that it's better than this virus outbreaks..
My God,
and now I am still complaining...
Arghhhhh....
Let's all hand in hand protect ourselves, protect our fam, protect our earth from this sorrow examination...
Stay healthy 😭😭...